been visiting my grandma for the past few days. when i saw her on the day she had her knee operation, she looked like she was in total pain. there was this huge metal support thing on her left leg, and that thing was like twice the size of her legs. plus she's so thin and weak i was so afraid she wont be able to take it. remembered when i saw her on the day she had her op, she was really really tired and frail, then i thought to myself "
i want to die young.." well but then again its not up to me how long im gonna live so yea.
was told today during MIEC we had to choose between International Economics and Finance(IEF) or Finance International Trade(FIT) for one of our modules in the second year. the lecturer said most local universities require students to take IEF, and that micro and macro are considered "baby economics", and IEF would be the "child". and that IEF is "
5 times harder"(the lecturer's exact words btw.) and one of the requirements to take IEF is to get at least a C for both micro and macro. but i got only a D for macro last sem. sorta gave up my idea of taking law overseas, and my second option would be SMU. but many of my seniors said IEF is a total killer and im
so gonna get screwed ten times over if i choose IEF since my micro and macro are like shit. i dont know which to choose. i so need tuition for econs.
help.
term break next week, common tests the week after. econs and CIP are still managable but im so gonna flunk BSTA. so bloody confident that i'll flunk it alright. somebody tell me why others can understand this f-ed up module so well and i cant? and tell me why do i have to get a bloody slack tutor for it? somebody just shoot me alright.
feeling increasingly frustrated with myself recently. why cant i be more sensitive at the appropriate times? damn it man. and i totally detest the feeling of helplessness; of not being capable enough to change anything. the feeling, its crushing me.
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